Feeling more sane now that I’m out of the environment causing me stress, but aware of the one year timeline I have before getting put into the same environment.
There’s a lot to do. Prob need therapy— no, I know I do lol. At least I know that friends are supportive and might be willing to help me stay out of the environment, even though I haven’t told them much because these issues are still something I’m processing. I just realize that if I shut people out of my life, as rough as it is right now, the end results of losing community and support is worse.
Just can’t let my depression thoughts get to me— it’s paralyzing. But like I said, being out of the environment has definitely improved my mental health, and I feel like I have a bit more control again over my life.
Ah, family— mainly my parents. Had a revelation that they’ve been financially abusive throughout my life and that’ll continue after college. I’m at the point though where I could list other traumatic happenings throughout life that this just feels like life slapping me in the face for “funsies.” They’ve been abusive/neglectful in many other ways so it feels… “normal,” at this point.
After a week of being back in my college town, I feel psychologically safer and I feel like I’m managing my short term issues while planning ahead more, so… I think I am in a better space. My concern in the far future is whether to even stay with them and save up money for a year— if the house doesn’t foreclose by then. Basically.
I am sorry that you have to suffer from your parents. I too was abused by my parents. I spent approximately fifteen years in and out of therapy because of it. I encourage you to seek therapy because I know how effective it is at healing.
Feeling more sane now that I’m out of the environment causing me stress, but aware of the one year timeline I have before getting put into the same environment.
There’s a lot to do. Prob need therapy— no, I know I do lol. At least I know that friends are supportive and might be willing to help me stay out of the environment, even though I haven’t told them much because these issues are still something I’m processing. I just realize that if I shut people out of my life, as rough as it is right now, the end results of losing community and support is worse.
Just can’t let my depression thoughts get to me— it’s paralyzing. But like I said, being out of the environment has definitely improved my mental health, and I feel like I have a bit more control again over my life.
Would you be willing to be more specific about “the environment”?
Ah, family— mainly my parents. Had a revelation that they’ve been financially abusive throughout my life and that’ll continue after college. I’m at the point though where I could list other traumatic happenings throughout life that this just feels like life slapping me in the face for “funsies.” They’ve been abusive/neglectful in many other ways so it feels… “normal,” at this point.
After a week of being back in my college town, I feel psychologically safer and I feel like I’m managing my short term issues while planning ahead more, so… I think I am in a better space. My concern in the far future is whether to even stay with them and save up money for a year— if the house doesn’t foreclose by then. Basically.
I am sorry that you have to suffer from your parents. I too was abused by my parents. I spent approximately fifteen years in and out of therapy because of it. I encourage you to seek therapy because I know how effective it is at healing.
Take care.