Now that I finally got the courage not to delete this, I’m a teen boy with a girlfriend, Emma. We are both minors, this is important to the post.
Emma found this YouTube channel for a show we both used to watch (we need to watch the new seasons). The person who runs it, let’s call Chris (~32M).
Emma commented on Chris’s videos because she liked his random content. He is very passionate about his interests and loves making videos, he’s also autistic just like us and takes great pride in being autistic as he should. Why be ashamed?
Well, Chris ended up finding Emma’s art on her channel and really liked it, so he asked her to draw for him. He used to pay people with $100 gift cards according to his old posts but wanted her to do it for free because he couldn’t be bothered or didn’t have the money.
Emma eventually got tired of this and told him she was too tired and also too busy with her studies, but he wouldn’t take the hint (I guess that’s ok, Emma and I miss social cues too). Her drawing tablet ended up breaking and she told him that but he was just like “Ok. Can you draw for me?” over and over.
(I originally put this first para at the end, but it’s pretty important, so putting up top) Be aware that just because we’re autistic, it doesn’t mean we’re not bad guys. He might be grooming her, he may already have more personal information than he should, and he may be targetting autistic children specifically. If you think that is the case, go to your parents or the police. I know that’s the last thing you’ll want to do, but the consequences if he is can be life changing or fatal.
(Original follows) Fellow autist here, if that matters, but probably not.
No, it’s not mean. People come and go out of each others lives all the time. Your time with this guy is clearly over - if it feels less than fun or has become uncomfortable or weird, move on. Why not? You don’t owe him anything.
As you know, autistic people are no strangers to being obsessive, and putting that alongside a lack of awareness when we’re pushing personal barriers, we can be really annoying. I don’t recommend you accept any money or gift cards from this guy, even to buy your GF a new tablet. That will give him a bigger feeling of entitlement and certainly gives him power over you.
Just stop communicating. No explanations, no apologies, both of you just stop and block. If he tries to contact you after that, or by other means, that’s creepy af and definitely report.
Sometimes we focus so hard on teaching appropriate social skills that we forgot to teach that it includes being cautious.