Unfortunately alive. USAmerican, gay

  • 7 Posts
  • 509 Comments
Joined 1 year ago
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Cake day: February 23rd, 2024

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  • Alice@beehaw.orgtoChat@beehaw.orghow's your week going, Beehaw
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    1 month ago

    Oh yeah I know, I wasn’t thinking about dating. I’m hideous. I just want to meet someone who doesn’t loathe me. I think it would be nice

    ETA I do think being straight is easier even if dating is hard. None of the straight people I know have families trying to cast demons out of them, none of them make friends only to later hear them talking about how their demographic are secretly trying to corrupt America and kill the Jewish people, et cetera.


  • New job on the way, I should be happy, but I feel insanely depressed.

    I wish I didn’t live over an hour away from the gay nightlife. I wake up at 5 and everything starts after I’ve been awake for 16 hours. I’m too sleepy and anemic to make the drive.

    I had to see my family and listen to them talk about how jealous they are that I’m forced to live in such a “quaint” backwater shithole even though I’ve told them I hate it. It must be soooooo easy to be straight. I have to jump through hoops to meet someone who doesn’t loathe me, and they’re all jealous.


  • Nah. I’m not 100% against it, some are fun or useful in concept, but I’m here to talk to people, and threads littered with grammar corrections and Sokka haikus get old.

    If there was an effective vetting process for useful bots, eg the repost sleuth bot, that’d be nice. But the “good bot”/“bad bot” voting system just became its own form of spam.



  • Rough as usual. Overworked, underappreciated. I have a driving test coming up for a new job, but my current job won’t give me the day off, and I don’t want to quit until I’ve passed that test. I’ll work it out, it’s just stressing me out.

    Multiple people online and in person have been unpleasant dicks to me when I honestly wasn’t trying to do anything wrong and it kind of depresses me. I want a social life but I hate people.









  • Never found the right balance. 🤷 I said “fuck it” anyway, because there’s a few reasons being less feminine is more comfortable for me. I like lifting weights but hate a sweaty scalp, so bye bye hair. I like the fit of men’s shirts more. And I realized that there’s a lot clothes and accessories that I find pretty to look at, but I don’t really get anything from wearing them.

    It sucks because customers and family both make rude comments, but at least my clothes are comfy.





  • Rough. Can’t find any jobs in my town besides factories and trucking, so I guess I’m probably gonna go work in a factory.

    Lymph nodes been swollen for three days and I can’t get to a doctor for nine more days, so that’s frustrating.

    I feel lonely and detached all the time. I miss when my friends and I were close. I’ve tried meeting new people but it’s not the same.

    If I’m not too tired after work tomorrow I’m planning a solo trip, just for the evening. There’s a park an hour away where I’ve heard you can see the stars, so maybe I’ll hit the local shops and grab an ice cream or something and wait til sundown. Maybe that’ll cheer me up.