Mostly lurking. United States southerner, gay, working retail. An amazing combination

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Joined 10 months ago
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Cake day: February 23rd, 2024

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  • A straight guy tried to hit on me in my DMs once and it took forever. He kept saying he had to tell me something and then saying something like “never mind, I’m too shy” or “I changed my mind”. I’d seen him at work earlier that day and I told him I was planning on gaming when I got home, so obviously I was AFK, but every time I took a while to reply he’d be like “?” “where did you go?” before I’d remind him that I had other shit to do, which just stretched the conversation out even longer.

    I’ve been told this was a dick move but I rejected him before he even got to the point because I couldn’t watch him do this to himself over someone who’s only into girls.


  • Awful. Black Friday, Cyber Monday, and the usual shit that comes with working retail during the holidays. I’m never home anymore. I’m always at work. I’m always trying to fill orders with equipment that doesn’t work, in back rooms stuffed so full of pallets I can’t reach the product I need, with deadlines I can’t hit.

    After I walked away from my friend group I stayed in touch with my best friend, and things were nice and it was a breath of fresh air at first, but now we fight all the time. He keeps going “I can’t keep doing this”, but I don’t know what he wants me to do. I feel like he engineers these impossible conversations where anything I could possibly say turns out to be wrong. If I point out that he’s contradicting himself, he gets upset because I know he has memory issues so I shouldn’t expect him to know what he told me last time. But he’s still allowed to get mad at me for doing what he asked…

    He kept saying things about me that straight up weren’t true, not subjective, and didn’t acknowledge it when I told him he was wrong. I’m pretty sure I caught him trying to gaslight me right after I thought we made up.

    I loathe everyone I know at this point. I know I need to give up on friends, but that just leaves me with my family, a bunch of homophobic leeches. My fucking father asked me for a DNA test on Thanksgiving. He could have asked decades ago, but he only decided now because he’s running out of excuses to fight with mom. All anyone ever wants to do is fight and tear other people down.

    I need to learn how to stop feeling lonely without turning to other people. All they do is upset me.


  • Pretty bad. I work retail and the customers and bosses have been horrible.

    My dad asked me for a DNA test at Thanksgiving. I agreed because I wanted to vindicate mom but now I realize that’s a stupid idea because he’s just looking to prolong a decades-long argument with someone who wants nothing to do with him. It doesn’t matter what the outcome is, it’s a way to get his foot back in the door.

    Great holiday. Hope he’s dead before the next one.

    I’ve been totally adrift since I gave up being a digital artist, and people keep telling me to try Bluesky because it’s “less hateful” than Twitter. I keep getting followed by queerphobes and there’s been some implied threat of cyberstalking.

    My friends’ reactions basically amount to, “well it’s not all fun and games to stand up for queer people, you should have known this would happen, if we chickened out like you we’d have to stop being queer altogether” like I didn’t have to grow my hair out and stop binding to get people to leave me alone.

    I know I’m too old for this but sometimes I wish someone would be nice to me. I’m tired of being manipulated and talked down to and pushed aside like trash. I wish my friends or my family or someone would just be like, “I’m sorry, that sucks” instead of reminding me every five seconds that I suck.


  • I’m extremely lonely but there’s nothing really to be done. I keep thinking I’m friends with people and then they pull away suddenly. Two of them even started acting like they didn’t remember making plans with me even though the plans were their ideas.

    Most people my age turn out to be homophobic and transphobic too, and only like me because they thought I was one of the “cool ones” (read: self-loathing). Or because they mistook me for a straight woman and think they can score.

    I don’t really understand people who can form genuine connections. My self esteem is in the toilet and even I won’t put up with that stuff.









  • I grew up in a hoarder house and I’m pretty sure I ruined my life by teaching myself to do the dishes as a kid. I was expected to keep the place clean for the rest of my childhood, and that turned into me being the only one to do chores of any kind. I was actually guilt tripped into skipping college so I’d be available to drive my sister to classes.

    So yeah forget all the drugs and murder and shit. The real worst thing a child can do is wash a dish.




  • Alice@beehaw.orgtoMemes@lemmy.mlDelection
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    1 month ago

    Yup. I don’t understand why people are talking like Harris isn’t also pro-genocide. Obviously more Americans are going to die under Trump and that’s a tragedy too, but why are people pretending the election was about Palestine?