Arms akimbo?

Meninges

Wow. You’d think “natural” would be more heavily regulated since a lot of people consider it to be a synonym for “harmless” (I am not one of them)

Trebuchet?

Fleas caused the death of my cat. A coworker generously brought a sample of her infestation in to the office and they must have hitched a ride home with me. My cats were indoor only, I didn’t expect them to need flea treatment. The fleas gave him hemobartonella and almost $20,000 later, we couldn’t get the anemia under control.

Nuke the fleas.

I subconsciously assumed they were watermarks and just ignored them completely

Make sure they are native seeds for the area you’re doing this in!

Uh, I agree?

I am also in Canada. Our province runs the power grid on coal and sold the utility to a private company that doesn’t bother with the expense of upkeep on infrastructure. They built a sweet skating rink though.

Could it have been a heron or a crane? When they fly their legs trail out behind them and their feet make them look a bit like a clubbed tail.

I didn’t know I was lactose intolerant for a long time. I used to have a carton of milk at morning break every day and release absolutely rancid SBDs afterward. One day was particularly impressive - the guy I had a crush on proclaimed it was so bad that if it had been his he would have named it.

You can get Hantavirus from their dried urine, saliva, and feces though

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One of mine would pick up mini marshmallows with a claw, lick all the powdered sugar off and then shake her paw to get rid of it, flinging the wet, sticky blob off into the unknown.

The guy in the cubicle next to me sounds like he’s dying. I have my desk fan pointed in his direction in a likely fruitless attempt to keep from being colonized by whatever noxious beasties he is fogging the air with.

We’d fire no guns, shed no tears!

Osteoporosis is a big one.

We used to grab globs of spruce gum off the trees to chew. Pain in the ass to get off your fingers though.

You are indeed missing the joke. This is a quote from the Simpsons.

Large turds are used to making a big splash