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Cake day: June 11th, 2024

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  • There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.

    Ezekial 23:20

    (side note, while looking up this verse it brought me to biblegateway.com where it shows dozens of translations basically in a list, and here is what the MSG (The Message) version translated that one single sentence into:

    “Her sister Oholibah saw all this, but she became even worse than her sister in lust and whoring, if you can believe it. She also went crazy with lust for Assyrians: ambassadors and governors, military men smartly dressed and mounted on fine horses—the Assyrian elite. And I saw that she also had become incredibly filthy. Both women followed the same path. But Oholibah surpassed her sister. When she saw figures of Babylonians carved in relief on the walls and painted red, fancy belts around their waists, elaborate turbans on their heads, all of them looking important—famous Babylonians!—she went wild with lust and sent invitations to them in Babylon. The Babylonians came on the run, fornicated with her, made her dirty inside and out. When they had thoroughly debased her, she lost interest in them. Then she went public with her fornication. She exhibited her sex to the world. “I turned my back on her just as I had on her sister. But that didn’t slow her down. She went at her whoring harder than ever. She remembered when she was young, just starting out as a whore in Egypt. That whetted her appetite for more virile, vulgar, and violent lovers—stallions obsessive in their lust. She longed for the sexual prowess of her youth back in Egypt, where her firm young breasts were caressed and fondled.

    https://www.biblegateway.com/verse/en/Ezekiel 23%3A20

    How fucking creepy is that? First of all, the entire concept of this “translation” just seems like outright heresy, but what the fuck even is this?? Did the dude just read about massive dongs and it got him all horny so he wrote some Bible fanfiction in the middle of his “translation”?

    Absolutely wild.


  • The next day the older daughter said to the younger, "Last night I slept with my father. Let’s get him to drink wine again tonight, and you go in and sleep with him so we can preserve our family line through our father.

    "So they got their father to drink wine that night also, and the younger daughter went in and slept with him. Again he was not aware of it when she lay down or when she got up.

    So both of Lot’s daughters became pregnant by their father.

    Genesis 19:34-36