I would make it so spices and anything intended to give flavor to food would only take effect once the food is served.
Every so often, teleport some random person who is alone in its location 3000 meter beyond the floor, and let them fall until they’re about 100 meter high, to then slow them down and put them back where they were as if nothing happened.
Would be interesting to see how such thing would be viewed by society as the number of reports would grow.
Appear at bowling alleys in the form of a chimpanzee bearing a scroll
I think I’d impose near instant karma. Dick cancer for rapists, sprained wrists for people who fap to porn I don’t approve of, billionaires would suffer extreme depression and paranoia until they downgrade to millionaire status, torturers get IBS and hallucinogenic migraines during every job, and corrupt politicians suddenly get unexpected bills for $100 more than the money they made from the crooked deal.
I’d offer people bargains to enrich themselves at the expense of others and then use my trickster powers to make them regret it.
Or if I could change shapes, I’d just rob bad people and do petty vandalism.
Every so often lettuce tastes exactly like bacon.
Invent non-alcoholic cocktails and charge the same price as one with alcohol.
- I will make infinite copies of myself, then 2) I will physically manifest myself in reality in all the different shapes, sizes, & colors I can imagine, then 3) I will experience life through the perspective of each of those infinite copies, one day at a time, one life at a time, 4) remove all memory of being God so the only memory I have in all of my life forms is the lived experience.
WAIT, I AM ALREADY DOING IT!
Repeatedly messing with some starship captain, then going back in time to start an internet cult that believes the most ludicrous shit possible. All to prove to that one captain that humanity is not worthy
Anyone who mentions, acknowledges, or even doesn’t sufficiently attempt to ignore/deny my existence or influence in the world, anything they eat tastes and feels like eating raw, unseasoned egg whites for a month. And I’ll put knowledge of that fact in everyone’s minds.
Then I can do whatever I want to annoy the fuck out of people and they have to ignore me. Wet Willie Elon Musk in public while looking him right in the eye. Replace the audio at a Kid Rock concert with Baby Shark for the whole show and everyone has to pretend it was a typical Kid Rock concert. Draw dicks all over Trump’s face with a sharpie during a presidential address on live, national TV. Find every HOA president and kill grass in their front yard in the shape of Bevis and Butthead.
I wouldn’t be unreasonable. A wry, approving smile here. Stopping and reading an obscene message I planted before realizing it was me. Stuff like that gets a pass. I might even turn a blind eye to an involuntary case of the giggles brought on by my hijinks, particularly if it helps the vibe. Also, anyone under 15 is exempt from the whole egg whites thing and can laugh their asses off and point with impunity.
