I was really confused until i understood that this is a satire comedy story.
This is the guardian. They’re deadly serious.
🫵 DIDN’T READ THE ARTICLE
Ooof do I really need a /s on this?
What has the internet come to?
Lemmy is chock full of people who cannot see sarcasm more than Reddit. Like, almost every post on The Onion community has a handful of users who don’t understand satire at all and have very oniony breath.
I’d sooner pretend I didn’t read the article than admit that was my idea of wit
Is this sarcasm? OMG I can’t tell anymore 😭. If yes please add /s.
It is the year 2025 and reality has unraveled to such an extent that Poe’s Law has the made the /s mandatory on all occasions of sarcasm or satire.
No i mean it literally is a stage play script satirizing Shabana Mahmood. Some of my favorite sections:
Shabana Mahmood had been dozing in bed when Shabana Mahmood had burst into her room and pulled back the duvet. Shabana forced her eyes open, trying to make sense of this unexpected intrusion. She reached for her phone. Where was her security detail? Surely this must be a mistake.
“I need to call Keir Starmer,” Shabana sobbed. “He will vouch for me. There must have been some mistake.”
“No mistake,” Shabana snarled. “And don’t go bleating to Keir. He’s the one who signed off on all this.
“Can’t you just give me a few more days? Why don’t you go and deport David Lammy first? I can give you his address.”
“This can’t be right. I couldn’t be more British if I tried. I’ve integrated so well I’ve even become home secretary. I’m a Labour politician whom Reform are happy to call one of their own. I have a couple of Union Jacks to drape myself in when I appear on GB News. I’ll even sign something to say I hate immigrants.”
“Not good enough, I’m afraid,” said Shabana. “The thing is you still look foreign. So pack up your things. On second thoughts, don’t bother. Because we’re going to take all your possessions anyway. Everything from your phone, your jewellery to your house. Just so no one comes over here with the idea that they can come over here, contribute and make a life for themselves.”
Fresh from deporting herself, Shabana appeared in the Commons late on Monday afternoon to give an update on her asylum and deportation policy. The system was broken, she said. There were dark forces at work. Somehow she made this sound as if she thought this was a good thing.
Last time I try and make a joke 🤣😞.
This is mannycalavera. They’re deadly serious.
The Uk and the US speed running to be the worse any%.
There’s a world of difference between a country abducting brown people off the streets and a country just not wanting to pay to endlessly fill hotels full of anyone who shows up on its borders
No Irish wouldn’t that violate the 1953 CTA agreement?
Didn’t stop the signs as late as the 1980s.
Savannah Mammoth
Shabanal Manhood
We had always given sanctuary to those who needed it, she said, only now we would kick them out as soon as possible
Yes it’s a lot easier to donate to charities when you’re not poor yourself
How exactly is Britain poor?
Public services may be poor, due to 15 years of austerity, but the country as a whole is not. It’s just concentrated in the hands of a very wealthy few who are so greedy and antisocial that they’d rather we all starve than they give up even a tiny percentage of their wealth.
Public services may be poor
People are also poor
Why poverty in the UK now is worse than 50 years ago and its grip is tightening every day
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/poverty-child-benefit-cap-labour-uk-b2806175.html
Worse than Rwanda: life prospects in Britain’s poorest areas
You’re confusing the experience of the average working class person with the purse strings of an entire nation.
Yes, people are poor. People are poor because wages have stagnated while prices and productivity have increased.
The capitalist class however have seen unprecedented wealth increase.
Britain is still among one of the richest countries in the world as a whole, despite its working class being squeezed for all they’re worth.
Money in the hands of the ultra-wealthy might as well not exist
Well yeah, that’s why it’s such a problem. They’re just like dragons hoarding gold. They sit upon their pile, delighting in watching it grow, but never giving any of it up. And they viciously attack anyone who dares suggest they do or attempts to via force or legislation.
Britain has vast wealth but fuck all to show for it. Huge banquets and fancy buildings for the other dragons but fuck all for the average person.
and how do you expect to squeeze money out of the capitalist class? same as australia ive never been worth more because my house is insanely overvalued but my day to day hasn’t changed much
maybe we shouldn’t use wealth as a barometer of a rich country and look at the experience of the average person instead ?
and how do you expect to squeeze money out of the capitalist class?
these guys had some good ideas on that front
And they were doing really well until everybody died
I don’t think she’s done any of the sort? Didn’t she just make it harder to get Indefinite Leave to Remain as a refugee?
Hey, try reading the article before commenting.
It’s some weird nonsense about the Home Secretary deporting herself written by this guy
So why did you take it at face value in your original comment?
I didn’t see much issue with what she said. I think Labour is coming up with a sensible strategy
Sensible? They call it Danish-style, but the Danish Social Democrats reportedly just got their bottoms handed to them at the local elections ballot box, losing almost half their mayors and about a quarter of their councillors from the last local elections, with Copenhagen electing a non-Social-Democrat mayor for the first time since the post was created in 1938. Is that what Labour really wants to turn itself into?
